The Lost Life of Isabella
by Boo Batchelor
Summary: When he first met Bella she seemed broken, stuck in a traumatic past with no hope for the future. Edward knew she was vital to him, but could he handle the hurdles she threw at him? M for dark themes, rape, self harm and mature scenes.
1. Chapter 1 (11-27 19:14:04)

**AN** : **So this is kind of a hard story for me to write but I think I need to get it out to someone who can't see me. This is my real life story, no embellishments, no added drama. This is how it is, only changing names and a few elements such as place and physical description to fit the fic**. **Short introductory chapter but I hope it'll get longer** **. Twilight ain't mine**.

She had so many dreams. What little girl doesn't? But so many crucial and horrific events occurred in the poor girl's past that he wasn't sure if she would ever truly love him.

They met on Thursday.

A chance encounter on an anonymous website had them reeling, two hearts so in sync that they seemed perfect for one another.

Their meeting the next day was his idea, he was hoping for romance... she only hoped he would not hurt her. She quickly learned, however, that he was a gentleman, and he discovered that from the first meeting he felt so strongly for the strange young woman with the long pink hair that even he could not explain. Her black clothes, worn to hide her from the world, only enhanced the pure white of her skin, her tiny hands sneaking ever further up her oversized sleeves; he thought her the sweetest angel he had ever met.

He was in love, but he had no idea who she was...what she had become, and who she may turn out to be.


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: This sort will probably start quite slow as I get into it but it should pick up quickly enough.** **Twilight is not mine.**

"Hi."

"Hi."

Two words shared between near strangers, and suddenly it was as though all had changed.

He was gorgeous, six foot two, with the messiest bronze hair she had ever seen and eyes so green that they shone like emeralds in the train's overhead lights. His height dwarfed her mere 5'3" stature, but he couldn't help himself from admiring the smooth curves of her body, the way her black jeans would cling to every inch of her slightly thicker thighs, her chest not large by any means but certainly not small; the perfect handful, he thought.

As he peered down at the beautiful young lady before him he noticed how anxious she seemed, clutching tightly at her hoodie as though to protect herself. He wanted to do it for her, be her knight in shining armour...or tinfoil, he wasn't exactly rich. Her hoodie looked thin, and she didn't wear a coat in the cold October winds, while he was bundled up in his hat, coat and scarf. Perhaps he should buy her a hot drink, he thought.

They met on the train, the express line to the town nearby. A neutral territory for them to bask in peace without fears of bumping into acquaintances. After a few short moments he realised he had only said hello, he had yet to introduce himself formally to his new friend.

"I'm Edward Masen, although I'm sure you worked that out," he said teasingly. She laughed, enjoying the unusual calm she felt around the beautiful man.

"Bella Swan, pleased to meet you," she replied, shoving her hands deep into her pockets to protect them from the bitter cold. Edward smiled, passing her his scarf.

The previous night they had spoken of music, and of films and of games but had not yet breached personal items yet; in fact Edward now had the pleasant task of approaching the dreaded age question. She looked about the same age as him but looks were deceiving.

"So...how old are you?" Their train had pulled into the station and they dismounted, walking side by side without making contact. She peered up at him.

"17, I'll be 18 in a month," she replied before inquisitively looking back.

"Ah," he murmured, "I just turned 17 earlier this month."

The first half hour was awkward. She was insanely attracted to the stunning young man, but that was exactly the problem; Edward was a _man_. Men only hurt women, that was what would happen if she was foolish again and she couldn't let that happen.

Edward could see the pain and apprehension in Bella's eyes but chose to not yet comment, allowing her to relax first. If he had his way he would have forever to ask.

They had walked around the large English town for an hour, visiting the castle on the hill, and standing on the pier. Bella then remembered a park she had visited several times with one of the men from her past and suggested they visit. Perhaps the presence of the angel that was Edward Masen would destroy those memories?

The pair trundled the twenty minute walk to the park, and on arriving sat on the top of the climbing frame. Bella looked at Edward, at her angel, and wondered if she would allow herself to fall. Edward, not realising the depth of her thoughts, threw a twig at her.

That day Edward learned three things. Number one, Bella was very, _very_ competitive. Number two, Bella's laugh was so beautiful that he wanted to record it and play it on eternal repeat. And number three? When a girl throws a dead cigarette butt at you? Definitely kiss her.

And kiss her he did.


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: Thank you so much to everyone reading because I really didn't think anyone would care enough. My very own Edward just had to calm me down while I got hyped up over this : ) I don't own Twilight.**

The last thing Bella expected when she went to meet this stranger named Edward was to be kissed. In fact she hadn't ever expected to be kissed, not by anyone. With boring brown eyes, a small stature with curves in all the wrong places and luminous pink hair that really required some root work, she was far from attractive. But as he sat in front of her, his large hands cradling her face as though she was an angel straight from his own heaven, Bella couldn't feel anything less than adoration radiating from the beautiful man's eyes.

And those eyes! My god they were so so beautiful, as green as the apple flavoured liquor she drowned herself in so often, and hair like the countless shiny pennies lying in her sister's money bank. She could tell that under his big coat and hoodie, Edward was far from built, but had no fat on him; he was lean and beautiful and perfect. And so far out of her league.

"So," Edward began, "you wanna head home? It's getting late."

Did she? Yesterday Bella would have said she wouldn't be seen near a man...but now? She wanted to live beside Edward, wanted to bathe in his presence eternally. She did not want to leave him.

"Okay." No.

"Okay, let's walk."

Bella tried to hold herself together. She couldn't have this man. She couldn't open up to him, a god, an angel like him couldn't know how broken she was, and that meant she had to let him go. They started the slow walk back to the station, and Edward noticed Bella's silence. Instead of pestering her, he stretched his fingers out, wrapping it around her smaller, hidden, hoodie-covered hand. Her surprised jump forced her to release her death grip on her sleeve, and his searching hand eagerly found her own.

He's holding my hand... Bella was awed, no man had ever touched her so delicately before. Maybe he's different... Before she could turn to ask him of his intentions, Bella laid her eyes on the rapidly approaching station. Her heart began to race, her throat constrict, her mouth go dry.

They made their way to the platform, standing close together. Edward had yet to release her hand, enjoying how it felt in his own. This girl was nothing short of amazing, they had so much in common...she was perfect for him.

As they pulled into their shared hometown, Edward and Bella dismounted the train and left the station, Edward eagerly talking away and Bella attempting to handle the strange pain in her chest. It wasn't her anxiety, she knew that feeling well. No, it was a new pain, gross and cruel. It's him, she thought, he started this.

"So where exactly do you live?" Edward looked at his girl's pretty face, enjoying the inquisitive look in her eyes, slightly shielded by her glasses. Bella couldn't hide her surprise.

"Why?" She wasn't above running and screaming, it wouldn't be the first time after all and she really didn't need a stalker.

"...So I can walk you home? If you're okay with that?"

Oh.

"Oh. Sure, I guess," she replied warily, leading him by the hand down the sloped road that led to her home. Edward followed happily, glad that she allowed him to follow her, feeling protective of the girl with the brightest hair he had ever seen.

The pair continued to chat as they journeyed the short trip home, things of little consequence, light, gentle topics to keep the calm atmosphere flowing. Bella saw her door looming above her, hating that this was where she had to return to after a wonderful day. Edward kissed her soft cheek, before turning her face to meet her lips.

"Can I see you tomorrow?"

"Yes of course! I'll text you later," Bella agreed, feeling like she could sing with joy. She turned after one more kiss and entered her house, her newly discovered happiness shadowing the hell she had just entered into once again.


	4. Chapter 4

**AN: Hi everyone, I'm sorry for taking forever to update but I got a whole lot of bad news recently and I haven't been in the right frame of mind to write this.** **This chapter is really short but important so to make up for it I'm going to give you both chapters 4 and 5 in one day! Also I don't know if you can tell but I don't have a beta because I'm kind of treating this as a diary? It would feel weird to get betaed on a diary... but anyway I try to ensure all my spelling and grammar are perfect since I hate mistakes. Hope y'all like it** **: ) Also Twilight is not mine.**

It had been a full week since Bella and Edward met, and they decided to celebrate by venturing back to the town they first kissed in.

The couple had been growing closer by the day, sharing kisses and holding hands, and even though they were newly together, they felt more connected than conceivably possible.

Today was the day Edward would change his fate, and because it was such an important day, he wanted it to be perfect. As he and Bella climbed across the rocky foot of the castle they had frequented as children, he realised that no place was better.

Bella was clueless. Not knowing what was to come, she stood on the massive stones and watched the waves roll in, the birds synchronising their dives and bobbing like rubber ducks, the sky more blue than usual despite the October chill.

"Bella?"

She turned to look at the young man before her, the question obvious in her eyes.

"Yes?"

"I love you."

He felt like he might choke. Was it too soon? Obviously, it had only been a damn week! She was going to run away, she would abandon him and he would never see-

"I love you too."


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: So as promised both 4 and 5 are now up. This is going to be hard to write, I already feel the nerves welling up and I hope I'll get it all out. In this chapter will be descriptions of assault, so please don't read this if you feel it would hit you too hard. I'm not going to include anything here that is super necessary to the story, so it should be readable without this chapter. Wish me luck. Text messages are in italics.** **Don't own Twilight.**

Bella knew it was time. She had to tell him before they fell too hard. It was going to hurt...but it had to be now.

"Edward? I have something to tell you..."

"Yes? What's wrong?"

"It's about my past, why I'm so anxious, why I panic sometimes."

September 26, 2013*

 _Okay, I'm coming over now. We can get food and then head to the school._

 _Sure, my mum is home so we should keep quiet._

It was Thursday and Bella and her boyfriend, James, were off school for a teacher training day, so they decided to visit their primary school together.

James was a few months older than Bella, and was subsequently in the year above her. They had been known for fighting in primary school, but James had harboured an unhealthy attraction to Bella for some time. However at 14, she was somewhat new to dating and had no idea that her admirer was too hungry for his own good.

It all started in March. Out of the blue, a boy long forgotten from her past suddenly seemed to recognise her. Recalling long lost memories of kicking his shins, they began to walk home from high school together. After a week he told her about his friend, Victoria, being sent away to an institution for suicidal tendencies, and mentioned that to be rejected would make him kill himself. 10 minutes later, when she was preparing to leave, he did something she would never expect.

" _Be my girl?"_

Bella, shocked at this request, decided to agree. She didn't like James romantically, hell barely as a friend, but suicide was scary.

Over the next six months, James changed. He began threatening her, hitting her and calling her names. Twice he forced her to "attend to his needs", pushing her head into his crotch and watching in delight as she struggled to breathe.

That Thursday, everything changed.

She walked to his house, just two minutes away.

Through the door, into the kitchen.

Juice, orange. Mopped spill.

James took her hand.

Upstairs, " _new model car..._ "

Bed.

Pushed, face down.

Loose jeans- gone.

 _Help_ -

 _Scream_ , hand-

 _Can't breathe_ -

She felt him. It wasn't like the movies. She felt herself stretch, she felt pain but it didn't pop, just...pulled. There was blood. There were tears. Her arms ached from their bound position behind her back- _when did that happen?_ He was too strong, too heavy to push off.

" _James?"_

Mother, home.

Jeans.

 _Run._

Bella picked up her bag and ran. Through the hall, down the stairs, out the door, home.

Shower, scrub, wash, clean.

Blood, pain, tears.

Her purity, her innocent body, defiled.

His smell everywhere.

Razor? _No. Too obvious. Too much blood._

A text.

" _Tell no one, or it won't be you next time."_

Never. It will never be anyone else.


	6. I'm Sorry

**AN: PLEASE READ.** **IF YOU ALREADY READ THIS PLEASE READ AGAIN ITS TOTALLY DIFFERENT.**

 **I made a lot of excuses in the previous AN I had here, but you deserve the real reason.**

 **In 2013, Bella's POV in chapter 5 became my reality and in November 2017 he went to court. After it was revealed that he had assaulted another girl, attempted to assault a third and had well over 8000 images of child pornography and graphic assault in his possession, he will be in court for a while apparently.**

 **I am sadly not confident nor comfortable enough to write about him and my past. I will sometime, but yes, this story is now officially ON HIATUS. Below is a short teaser. I plan to post one shots and even have an actual story planned, but The Lost Life of Isabella won't be touched for the foreseeable future.**

 **I'm sorry.**

 **Disclaimer: If I owned Twilight, nothing would ever happen because I'm too emotional to actually write.**

Several weeks had passed since the day Edward and Bella had professed their mutual love. They had been growing closer by the day, and Edward's family were quite accustomed to seeing the pair running up the stairs where they would spend an entire day talking, eating, playing games for hours on end.

The couple had grown surprisingly close, given his trust issues and her major dilemma regarding men. Today, however, they were venturing outside of his home. Today they were playing ball, with his family.

As they drove to the field, Edward took Bella's hand. He knew she was scared, nervous especially after she found out about Edward's brother and his sister's boyfriend.

Two new men, plus his father?

This would be a nightmare.


	7. Review AN

Dear Readers.

I just updated my fanfiction app and discovered that none of my replies to reviews are posted. I don't know if they ever were and my reply button is missing.

I am so so appreciative to all and any reviews I get, to you for reading my stories and telling me what you think.

If I can't post a reply directly to you I'll add it to this exact chapter, but I'm hoping I can soon resolve it.

Thank you all so much for reviewing, it means the world to me.

Yours faithfully,

Boo Batchelor

To MysticPixie279

Did you know you were my first ever review? Thank you so much for taking the time to review my story, I hope that you're not too upset by my current hiatus. Your words gave me the courage I needed to write on. Thank you endlessly.

Love Boo


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